Dear Future Lilly,
I hope you’re happy. I mean that in the least sarcastic or condescending way possible. I sincerely, wholly wish that you’re happy. This is not to say that 21 year old you isn’t happy right now – 21 year old you is warm in bed with a belly full of food, 21 year old you is lucky. But I hope you aren’t still striving for that end goal you always bang on about. The ‘this is just a step to the next stage of life’ mentality that you can’t help to shake off. I hope you’re content with what you’ve got, because I can already bet you’ll have a lot.
I hope you no longer have days where you’re convinced the world is against you, though I doubt that’ll ever go away. I hope you don’t sit up and cry sometimes, overthinking about a friendship gone wrong, or some stupid thing you might have said years ago. I hope you realise that it’s better to focus on the things you do have, rather than the things you don’t.
Future Lilly, I hope the optimistic streak in you hasn’t faded. In fact, I hope it’s even stronger than before. I hope you’re an inspiration to your loved ones, your kids (oh yes, Future Lilly, I hope you have one or two of those). I hope that you are loved unconditionally, and that every day begins with a smile.
I really hope you still love baking, and that you still do it regularly. I hope you’ve finally mastered how to make pastry and I hope you’ve found a way to use about half of the equipment when cooking that you did at 21.
I hope that you forgive yourself when you make mistakes, and that you let go of the past.
I hope that you still close your eyes and let music wash over you, I hope you allow your heart to burst and the tears to flow when the notes strike a chord with you. I also hope you’ll have forgiven me for that awful pun, but you’ll probably be snickering at it right now instead.
I hope that you still sing in the car, and I hope that the Aygo didn’t have a bitter end, but I sincerely hope you’re not still driving that thing. I hope you manage to check your own oil levels and tyre pressures now.
There are so many things I hope for you, so many things I wish I could be sure of at this very moment, but know that these things will happen despite my strongest desires. I hope you never have to feel pain, heartache, sorrow. I hope you experience the happiest day of your life every single day.
And last but not least, Future Lilly, I hope you have a puppy.